Schwartzy and Pagana do a Burlesque Show


It was not that long ago that I went to a burlesque show with a friend and complained about the guy hosting it. It’s not that he was bad but we had heard the same jokes from this guy over and over and over again. (Apparently we went to burlesque shows a lot). Finally, the gal who runs the show ( said to us, well then, why don’t you two your smart asses (she has a filthy mouth) just do it yourselves? 

Pfff. Sure. How hard can it be?

So for the past two days in all our spare time when we should’ve been working or stalking ex girlfriends, we’ve been writing comedy bits in the tradition of old Vaudeville acts.

Now, for you writers out there… have you ever tried anything like this? It’s so bizarre. I have been in this mode of bad punch lining since we began. I’m asking every question at work like I’m Bud Abbott and throwing out bad jokes and punch lines in the most inappropriate situations. Waiters, kids, my mother… everything that someone says to me is responded to with some kind of smart allecky remark. (Although one of my co-workers say I’ve been in that mode since I’ve met him)

Anyway, we have come up with a number routines that I have NO IDEA how they are gonna come off. We’re not performers. We’ve never done a live show. We have twenty minutes of material we need to perfect and memorize by next Wednesday night.

So if you wanna see what we’ve come up with check us out at the Aura Nightclub, 12215 Ventura Blvd. in Studio City (California) Wednesday Night December 16th 9:00pm.

We’re inviting our porn star friend Charley Chase (story to come) and even wrote her into our act, so if you don’t wanna see us, at least come to see her. Oh, and the dancers. I hear they’re gonna have dancers between our bits.

(And oh yeah, my partner’s name is Schwartzy)

Leave a Reply