Making Use of Useless Facts

Posted By AndyFan: Little known fact, our fearless leader is full of little known facts. He is full of many other things too, but we have so much time and space to get to that. Little known and useless facts are one of Andrew’s hobbies. How to fill his windshield wiper fluid or stretch a canvas, not a clue. What George Warshingten wore for pajamas the night before the crossing of the Delaware, just ask Andy. (I think he said they were of the plaid variety, but I sometimes think he is making this all up. I am not even sure if I am real any more.) Andy is so topped to the brim with useless facts (he does like a good useless facts hat with a wide brim after all) that it comes as a pleasant, albeit startling, surprise when he in fact udders a useful and pertinent fact. Especially one in which the resolution to a computer problem is concerned. I don’t mean the resolution of an image on a computer, he still has difficulty with that. I mean the type of resolution that keeps him from calling me at 3 AM to yell at me about why his computer does not work. As with the cattle I am most often of no use (I type on these things, how the hell do I know how it works. hit a, you get an a. Shift a and you get a capital a, like this—A). Since he has had me working on this blog I have been very tired. There is so much research that goes into So I have not been “available” to answer all of his calls. So it is a shocking surprise when I get my voicemail at 3:07 AM and he has relayed a message of udder despair about his dead computer and I call him to try and help. Oddly, he answers in a very calm and tranquil tone (ok, that just sounded good, but did anyone buy it?) and he has figured out the solution. Impressed I asked what he did. I plugged it in he says.

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