Jun 16 2011

Falling Asleep on the Job

Posted by AndyFan: Friends, Romans, countrymen, you all suck b@lls. Where are the praiseful words? Where are the scornful eyes? Envy? Disgust? Where is the violent reaction to Andy. He’s done things lately (and here, but we won’t talk a bout the parallels) and been cock blocked by unnamed blogs that exist this very day in Los Angles. Good or bad, but don’t be indifferent. Andy hates indifference. OK, he hates indifference when he is the subject. He tends to be indifferent towards many things but we all know they aren’t that interesting, otherwise Andy would be interested, and thus, not indifferent. I know you see what I am saying. Basic math my friends. Basic math.

Jun 10 2011

I Got Nothin’ Dude

Posted By AndyFan: You expected more? Seriously? Can I ask what blog you have been reading all this time? Are you new? Really, you expected more? WE, are disappointed? You don’t want to see us disappointed. It is not pretty.

Jun 8 2011

Good Morning Los Angeles!

Posted by AndyFan: That tremor in the force—the one the sent a ripple effect across the eastern seaboard over this past weekend and resulted in a sweltering 102 degree forecast for today—that wasn’t global warming or some mega storm. No. It was Andy. Andrew if you must. From Warshingten to Esopus, our fearless leader laid a path of mayhem up and down the right coast that will cost its citizens countless minutes of untold confusion, especially if you are in the employ of a Dunkin Donuts. Without warning the devastation started days ago. New Jersey will never be the same. On his way out of town he swung by Warshingten to pay me a little encouragement visit. I bid him adieu and felt it was my duty to warn you all.

Los Angeles. Andy should have just landed. We envy your good fortune.

Mar 6 2011

“Thanks for the Memory, Record Guy” (Me and Bob Hope)

So I go into a record shop (yes, RECORDS) today and I ask the guy if he had any Skinnay Ennis albums and he said “I sold Bob Hope Skinnay Ennis albums. In fact, Bob Hope was the last person to ask me for Skinnay Ennis. I’m not sure why, but I got a kick out of that.

Dec 22 2010

But We Just Met?

Posted by AndyFan: Jordan it’s not you, really, it’s Andy. Apparently you have known him long enough to know this, but don’t believe half of what he says or any of what he does. I think that is right. If not, trust no one. Sorry, we could have been such good friends.

Dec 22 2010

Kansas Blows

Posted by AndyFan: People always talk about the coasts being different from middle America. Well apparently you can’t get more in the middle of America than Kansas. You will see Kansas. One day you will see. And you will rue the day  you could have been the epicenter of greatness.

Dec 22 2010

Usually it is the other way around.

Posted by AndyFan: By some stroke of a holiday miracle, Andy and crew are traveling due west of the storm of the century (how long is that exactly, I missed that week in economics). Laying a blank canvas before him to write his name across America, Andy is half way home (and by half way we mean not sure where the hell he is but he isn’t stuck on the side of the road in some icy grave trying to determine who will break it to Jordan that if it comes down to it he will be the first sacrificed). For those watching the news, somehow like Noah (those are gonna be some fugly kids) our noble crew was able to get through the floods of California. Sorry Cali, you can’t put that one on the Captain, he has an alibi, Schwartzy was with him the whole time.

Dec 22 2010

Usually I Wouldn’t Follow Such a Serious Post…

Posted by AndyFan: …but I have been pissed since I was five years old that those stupid French movies didn’t have an animated pink cat throughout, so on with show. Rest in Peace Mr. Edwards, you would have liked Andy.

Dec 17 2010

So Julie Andrews is single, eh….

Actually, as much as I have always had the hots for Julie Andrews, I am sorry for the passing of her husband Blake Edwards today. (First Bob Feller…) After all, he’s the freakin’ guy who created the Pink Panther franchise, which has provided this Clouseau fan with countless hours of entertainment and inspiration. Thanks B.E.! I’m sorry you never had a chance to meet me… 🙁

Nov 20 2010

Schwartzy and Pagana meet… Meili Cady