Posted by AndyFan: It is not often Andy calls with a pressing need of calamitous proportions. Rarely if we are counting, or rarely do we count, I am not quite sure, Andy nor I do well with math, just ask his well-paid accountant (who says there is no money in the budget to pay an Andy or an AndyFan) or sit down and have a conversation with Andy about the National Debt Ceiling. He will expound about simply getting a few illegal aliens at reduced rates to tear down the existing one and put up a higher one. They’ll have the job done in three days tops. But as for calamity, Andy tries with all of his might to stay clear of the sauce. However, once in a moon he does call to vent or seek consul from his trusted AndyFan when he has dipped his chips in it. The last such incident went as such:

Andy: “AndyFan, I have a problem.”

AndyFan: “You know I have a name right Andy?”

Andy: “Seriously, did I call to talk about your problems or mine?”

AndyFan: “Sorry Sir, what’s the problem?”

Andy: “I have a friend (for the sake of this conversation we will refer to said friend as “H”) who I think I upset.”

AndyFan: “Did H tell you he was upset?”

Andy: “No, I just know.”

AndyFan: “Did you do anything to make H upset?”

Andy: “That is irrelevant. What’s wrong with you?”

AndyFan: “Sorry, I am not sure how you want me to help if…”

Andy: “I want to know how to make said friend understand me like you do?”

AndyFan: “Sorry, I don’t follow.”

Andy: “Typically.”

AndyFan: “Sorry?”

Andy: “You should be.”

AndyFan: “Sir?”

Andy: “Look, how do I get my friends, especially H, to take it like you do.”

AndyFan: “Take what?”

Andy: “Me. Andy. Seriously, are you paying attention or smoking something over there?”

AndyFan: “Well, Sir, I am a door mat. Says so on my business card. Not sure your friends are the same.”

Andy: “No, they certainly are not!”

AndyFan: “Why don’t you just apologize?”

Andy: “What are you smoking? Look, can you just post a little story about how I don’t like to upset my friends, least of all H?”

AndyFan: “But Sir, you told me never to post a falsitude.”

Andy: “True. Very True.”

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